Through and through our on going battles of bad beats inflicted by the famous donkeys of Pokerstars, we will always keep our chins up no matter how bad things get in lieu of things will eventually get better. Since there is no quit in the teams blood, we will keep true to our game realizing that the tides will change and there will be a chance of redemption, always keeping in mind that bad play will catch up to these donkeys in the long run and solid play and consistency will pay. I will say this, Pokerstars delivers some of the worst bad beats and at times seems to reward the bad play sooo much it is chronic and it also becomes ” SIK WIT IT ” which is a perfect slur for these rediculous online hands because it resembles the feeling most players are left with “sick”! My suggestion is we rally team and turn things around on these idiots and give them what they deserve sooo much, The Crackalack and put their asses to the rail! The Captain here to tell ya mates, its time to show the donkeys of Pokerstars who can really get ” SIK WIT IT “hehehe

Donkabulary definition

SIK WIT IT: The frame of mind we need to bring ourselves to in order to deal with donkeys and their terrible play by giving them a taste of their own medicine!

Hello mates The Captain here with another shit talkin slur for ya! On occasion we get the pleasure of being short stacked at a table where there is a bully that has marked us “the weak” spot! Welll mates, being card dead doesn’t give us much of an option but take the bully’s abuse. WRONG! Choose your spot and SHUV~ all your chips allin not once but every time the bully comes after your blinds! The Captain here to tell ya mates, Texas NL Holdem poker is NOT a passive game and prepare yourselves to SHUV~ your chips into your next table bully! If you don’t put the ole crackalack to his ass, you definately will set the record straight and he will find new blinds to steal! NOT YOURS! Remember mates being passive in this game will only take you so far! Good luck in your next games!

Donkabulary definition

SHUV~ :What we need to do to fend off a table bully that has obviously made us the mark as the weak spot and we decide to take no more of his non-sense!

Hello team, what is new in your game of online poker? Anything new to report to the team? There has been an endless contraversial debate over the question of “Are these donkeys who we want in our hands calling us down to the river with rags?” Well The Captain here to tell ya mates these are exactly the players we are looking for when we are looking to get a lil action on our pocket AA or KK! Of course giving these donkeys “The Crackalack” and railing their asses becomes “Donkalicious” and there is nothing better than a lil donkey for dinner! The Captain here to tell ya mates, make sure you make your next meal at Pokerstars “Donkalicious”!

Donkabulary definition

Donkalicious: The delightful yummy feeling of busting up any donkey who calls off all their chipstack trying to get lucky with their rags!

Hey mates.. Any wins to report to the team? We as poker players always enjoy the feeling of getting inside the bubble when playing online tourneys as there is always a breath of relief and the sensation of curiousity as we see how far we can climb the money ladder. Of course we will always have 1st in our sights for the largest percentage of the prize pool and taking 5th 0r 4th is not really going to be acceptable to us. Well mates when we find ourselves short stacked with 4 players between us and 1st place The Captain calls this transition “Bang time”! As they say, “this can get ugly” and The Captain is ready to hit ya with the ugly stick! BANG! Of course we will reserve “Bang time” for when we are short stacked in our darkest time of need at a final table!

Donkabulary definition

Bang time: The urgency to regain momentum in order to take down a monster 1st place win when climbimg the money ladder!

We have mentioned on occasion of how much help “team support” can be during a marathon! The team has come up with a few team chants to let each member know that the team is behind them. One of the most common chant’s used “Lets git rr done” was first used by “Leafsmaywin” directed towards me in my darkest time of need. Yours truly was sitting on the bubble in the 55k guarantee short stacked so bad I wouldnt see the next orbit of blinds when “Leafs” came to my table and said “Lets git rr done” Cappy! In them moments of shock and awe I went from last place to very top of the leader board in a blink of an eye leaving me the opportunity to finish the event in 19th place! Mates always remember “the team is behind you!”

Donkabulary definition

“Lets git rr done“: Words of encouragement to stick with it and get it done!

Although Pokerstars is a favorite place for the team to play, it has been refered to as many different things. “Jokerstars” is probably the most commonly used name. Since we have been playing there over the years we have heard a few more like, “Riverstars” or “Retardville” hehehehe. Well mates, your Captain (as usual) has come up with a name of his own! The stuff I have wittnessed, not only on the poker tables but whats been said in the chatbox as well only makes me think of one thing and one thing only; “Donkey Daycare” which is ALOT like a childrens daycare except it has the sick twist of adding Texas NL Holdem poker into it! There ya go mates another poker slur from your Captain. Just don’t forget to bring a pacifier to your next Pokerstars game!

Donkabulary definition

Donkey Daycare: The name of the largest poker room 0nline. Donkeys love to play at Pokerstars because they are always rewarded with their miracle suckouts and treated well for their bad play!

Hello team, how’s it all hangin online? As we see more and more of the notorious Pokerstars badbeats we can’t help to notice the true culprits behind these disaster hands. These guys that are so predictable at what they do its unreal. One of their famous moves is calling allin on a draw. Cough cough, gasp!

Myself and The General were playing a sit n go oneday when we noticed this player chasing down flushes and straights with no pot odds and hitting like a fool. The General says to me, “Look at that lil “Flush Monkey” go!” And away he went playing any 2 suited cards and calling any sized bet chasing cards like a lil monkey! The amazing part is how these guys get away with what they do, showing down their rags with the famous excuse, “but they were sooooted”. The Captain here to tell ya team, if your top pair with top kicker is looking good and there are 2 suits to the flop “BEWARE” because there maybe a “Flush Monkey” sitting right next to you! It’s a safari out there mates, so grab all your weapons and happy hunting!

Donkabulary definition

Flush Monkey; A bad player who plays any 2 suited cards and chases down a flush draw with absolutely no odds to make a call pretty much has the intelligence of a monkey! Or create your own like, “dammn donkey lovin flush monkey” after he hits runner runner, that usually works good for me!

Hello mates, and what is new in your world of online poker? That good? Hehehehe Not that good for The Captain, I’ll tell ya. Its been one of the worse weeks to date. Just when you think you have seen it all “BAM” and some of the worse badbeats you will ever see! Soooo bad that I have come up with another slur for our illustrious team. The beats I have seen and the crap I see played is unreal. JJ and I raise 6X the blinds and get early position callers and hit a J77 flop. I go allin and the donk calls me with 75 and hits his miracle 7 on the turn? The donk makes quads with 75 off? What in the world was that donkey doing in the hand when there was a HUGE preflop raise? Thats soooo rediculous…No… its “Redonkulous!” so bad you can’t even believe your own eyes! There ya go mates, Pokerstars and their badbeat players are most certainly “Redonkulous!”

Donkabulary definition

Redonkulous: The ridiculousness of getting all your chips takin by a donkey calling your allin with 72 offsuit!

Hello mates! What has been happening in your game of online poker? As The Captain ponders some of the largest fields that Pokerstars has to offer, there is nothing worse than some huge chipstack bully landing on your table right next to you! Most players will avoid the bully at all costs and try to race smaller stacks to their own. Not The Captain! I love to go right at the bully chopping his stack down to nothingness and put him to the rail as he so much deserves! This may take a few hands but it will be inevitable he will implode and what other way to earn a little table respect! Thus we have arrived to our next poker slur: “The Crackalack” which is The Captains favorite pass time at Pokerstars, “Crackalack the table bully!” There ya go recruits, and just remember that the team is always behind you!

Donkabulary definition

“The Crackalack”: To crackalack the table bully, or beat him down to the point where hes on the ground with his face in the dirt and you are stomping your foot on the back of his head while asking him; “Who is your donkey daddy?”

Hello mates and it has been awhile! The Captain is back with all the shit talkin slurs we have all come to love and adore so much! One of the most famous “slurs” of The Captains is renaming our fabulous rebuy to a “REDONK” as it seems so fitting when the first hour is spent “donkin” off all your chips back and forth trying to create massive chipstacks during the rebuy period! Talk about bad beats mates??? We’ll have to save them stories for some future topics! Hehehehe, hey The Captain here signing off and sayin “I’ll see ya’ll at the next REDONK!”

Donkabulary definition

REDONK; meaning Rebuy tournement.